Local Dog Shits on Donald Trump’s Campaign Poster

AUSTIN, TX—A local dog has successfully taken a shit on Donald Trump’s campaign poster while walking to the dog park. The dog, named Fluffers, was being walked by his owner when “he tugged on the leash so hard that I lost grip.” The dog proceeded to press his butt against the poster and unleash a giant pile of doggy doo. The owner, Jeb Martin, was horrified at the sighting and decided to post a picture of his dog’s smug look after the fact. “The dog seems to know that Trump deserves a steaming pile of shit all over his face,” a local resident screamed in approval. The rest of the Austin area isn’t too happy with the dog, as they all plan on voting for Trump. Martin decided to give the dog up for adoption because he “only accepts pure-blooded Republican dogs.” Martin was also afraid that if he kept Fluffers, his neighborhood would disown him, and probably even skin them both alive. “It was best I put him up for adoption. We’ve been through a lot, but I feel he stabbed me in the back.” The dog can be purchased at a local animal shelter in Austin for around fifty dollars.