Crusher Headphones Actually Crush Skulls

PARK CITY, UT—Major headphone manufacturer Skullcandy introduced their lineup of Crusher headphones a few years ago, but newer models are a cause for concern. When the company launched in 2003, they were a formidable force in the headphone industry. Today, their relatively new Crusher line of headphones is apparently actually crushing skulls. The motto of the Crusher headphones is “bass you can feel,” but we argue that it’s hard to feel anything once you’re dead. To date, over 600 fatalities have been reported due to the headphones. CEO of the company, Hoby Darling, issued an official statement regarding the matter: “We are aware of supposed fatalities due to our Crusher headphones, but a warning label was clearly printed on the box.” It’s true, a warning label is clearly printed on the box it comes in. The 600 people who have died must overlooked it, or they were well aware of the dangers the headphones are capable of but used them anyway. If you’re looking for bass you can feel, you may be better off purchasing a subwoofer unless you’re into cracking your skull.